Not as Pissy this morning

Been talking with DLR and Crystal. Missed Viking's IM and missed BroD calling. BroD is comming in Saturday night with his Family --1 wife and 3 girls. The household is going to be a train wreck... So, If I don't post as often in the next 3 weeks or so, you know why... BroD is comming in from Indiana. When they leave Arkansas they'll be going back to Africa to continue thier Missionary work over there.

Pebbles let me borrow these really awesome Handcuff earings, I was gonna wear them today at the concert. Obviously, I'm not going, which saddens me so much!

A few of my Sneezy pals offered to come down and whip his ass! lol. Thats awesome. Atleast I know they care. Don't know if your reading this, but you put me a few steps closer to feeling better lastnight.

I'm actually liking the fact that I'm single. Really, I am. I know, technically I was single before, but when your in a 'relationship', you have to take into consideration other people's feelings and wants and needs... FUCK that! I am so sick of that shit and not doing for me. It seems all relationships I'm in its "give give give" and they "take take take" and never "give" back. Oh I'm so sick of that shit.

Now, I'm thinking of MY future. What 'I' want to do. Should have been this way from the beginning. VERY beginning. So tired of giving and not recieving. (no, I'm not talking about blow-jobs! --dirty minded!)

Now I have me at a crossroads tho... Do I stay right where I'm at in Arkansas. Move to Memphis when the time is right and do the whole Music Biz thing with TeeJ. Or do I live here long enough to get my shit together and when I'm ready, head to Chicago?

So, I'm bouncing back n forth.... Chicago or Memphis? {Its a no brainer I don't want to stay where I'm at!} Windy City or Music Row? Hmmm. Most wouldn't think its a hard decision to make, but for me it is. You see, I'm so very torn on living with Crystal in Chicago and having the time of my life. Or, hooking up with TeeJ (Not romantically, professionally) in Memphis.

Eventually I'll figure it out. When the time is right I'll figure it out. Right now, Here I am. I'm living my life. I'm happy again. I'm 'content' with this at the moment. Gonna work even harder now to get that elusive 2nd job I've been after. Preferably one at night or late late evenings. Actaully been thinking about going back to Wal-Mart and seeing if I can get on nights there again. Only problem with that is, I have to be at the Hamptons by 8am, sometimes I wouldn't get out of Wal-Mart until after 9am. So, that might not be the best choice. However, I could use my money from Wal-Mart to pay the bills. Most of my money from the Hamptons to play with and save back a little more. It would be nice to not have to struggle financially. The Hamptons really don't pay very well. I know other people probly get way more less than I do. But still, more hours would help! I'm lucky if I get 40 hours aweek.

Speaking of! guess I need to do my laundry and look through yesterday's paper. See where I can go apply at.