Not again, please not again.

So, I got a phone call Saturday night after having been out all night. Its 'BamaBoy. I was just about to fall asleep when He calls and asks if he can come and get me.

I say yes.

He comes and picks me up. We go to his apartment. He plays the guitar for me. He's so nice and sweet. he's tired. I'm tired. He asks if we can go lay down and take a nap because he has to go get his kids in the morning. I said sure. we lay down in his bed. he has his arms wrapped tight around me. I'm lying with my head in the crook of his arm.

Next thing I know, he says he's sorry and he can't help it. He starts kissing me. Next thing I know, I'm swept away in the moment. Its been a long time since I've had it, let alone have it and it been good. So I go with the flow. And he's amazing. wonderful kisser and the kind of lover to know exactly what to do.

We do it twice. and then fall asleep snuggled together.

He kisses me on my forhead in the morning saying its time to get up darling. He takes me home. I havn't heard from him since.

I broke down and called him this afternoon. Invited him to the Resort's Holiday party on the 13th of January. Havn't heard anything yet.

Why can't I talk about this in my public journal? Because there is someone I think I'm falling for. Or he's falling for me. And I think he reads it. And if he knew about 'BamaBoy, he'd be seriously hurt. And I don't want to hurt anyone.

I'm just confused. I want BamaBoy. I know I'm falling for him. I have been since we first met over a month ago. He calls atleast once a week and asks about the Karaoke. He use to come down and see me sing, but him and the KaraokeGuy got into it.

*sigh*

someone, help me please.