so, i admit i've been rather hard on myself and not taking things very well lately. i guess we all have those moments.
today was your regular ol' hell of a day with added sleet & snow and subzero temps and traffic jams. left for work at 630 this morning, finally got home at 8pm. BUT! i did get my taxes filed and have the money to pay off gettin the car fixed so that's good. i dont get to go to arkansas or get my tattoo like i wanted, but i have another game plan for that, courtesy of a friend.
Speaking of friends, I think one of mine is about to make a huge mistake and I wish she wouldn't do what she's considering. But like me, once she gets her mind made up thier isn't any turning back until the damage is done.
Here's to me finally being able to sleep tonight (I was up all night tossin and turning and woke up 5 mins before time to leave, so you know what that ment ---yea, I'd stear clear of me right now, too! lol) because of some of my stresses being 'relieved' today, I'm hoping I get a nice rest.
Now if only I could find someone to help me.......oh, wait, this is the public journal. oooooops! (just kiddin) But,
UGH, I have a confession, I wanna talk about it and I'm afraid to talk about it because this person, I don't want to lose them as a friend. I've been crushin hard on him for a while now. UGH. If only I could see him more often, I'd get him to fall in love with me. He's my dream man that I've been searching for minus 1 thing is different about him, and that's cool because I'm totally into that other thing as well. And damnit, If I dont shut up now i'll blurt out everything and he'll hate me forever. Because I'm sure I'm not his type and I'd rather have him as a friend than nothing at all. Sex atleast ONCE with him and then just friends forever would so satisfy me tho! (If you read this and you figure out who you are and your cool with that, let me know!)
SO! lol, packerfan from work is still around. We spent alot of time together Sunday night bitching about the Bears and hoping the Colts to win and it happened. He even stayed in with me til I left (while the truck was warming up so i wasn't outside alone in the middle of the night) he keeps trying to make plans, but our schedules conflict so badly.
And me and TacoBell are becomming good friends. Friends being the optimum word here, I remember someone saying I didn't KNOW HOW to be just friends with a guy. Well in the past and present your proved wrong. Wait, what about all those guys I hang out with at CR. We're all just friends. Like a big family, my brothers/cousins practically.
And ofcourse we have my fave man on the otherside of the world! Which, one of these days I will get over my fear of flight and go visit him. Most likely I'll be drunk off my ass, but I will get there. Via Plane. Because I think I'm more afraid of a boat capsizing and me being in a freezing cold water and dying like those people did on the Titanic.
I have alot of unnecessary and weird fears you know that? lets count them off....
I'm afraid of:
Planes, Trains, Boats that are far from shore, the Dark (yes, i have a night-light), pain, needles (but i love to get my tattoos), spiders, snakes, bugs in general, fire, the cold (subzero temps), never having sex again --with a male or female-- and alot more I'm sure if I thought about it.
But the top 3 fears of all time would have to be in this order:
FIRE
PLANES
SPIDERS/SNAKES (tied)
Goodnight!
The guy you are crushing wouldn't be Rod would it? I don't care just curious.
ReplyDeleteNo its not him. this guy I've been friends with for along time. about 10 years.
ReplyDeleteshit, i just totally told on myself. he'll definatly know who he is now.
ReplyDeleteChastise me soundly if I unravel your whole gin up the courage to fly by denigrating the alternatives routine, but the water along the reasonably likely routes between the US and NZ is not particularly cold (the Titanic hit an ice berg in the bloody northern Atlantic after all - and one doesn't hear much about that sort of thing in the middle latitudes of the Pacific - no danger of icebergs around San Diego or Baja, for example).
ReplyDeleteMy dad said that NZ was one of the very most beautiful places on Earth (one of my old law partners agreed wholeheartedly). And they speak English there! Of course, the money is funny colors, but most Yanks can overlook that.
km
Of course, then again, NZ was about the only place my dad visited during the war where he didn't get shot, stabbed or blown up, and it wasn't on fire or in the process of blowing up while he was there. That probably contributed to the warm and fuzzy feelings he had for place.
ReplyDeleteIt is remarkable how much positive spin a place can get from one getting a welcome respite from people actively and enthusiasticly trying to kill one.
how did you figure out its NZ? or did you just use the common denominator that we both know someone 1/2 way around the world?! lol
ReplyDeleteSo he stayed out of Manners St then.
ReplyDelete