This week has been exciting and uneventful at the same time. Nothing that I really wanna discuss or talk about on here. Just things I want to keep to myself at the moment. If your a "close personal" friend of mine, you already know all about the bullshit this week held for me.

Some shit almost went down between me and my Cowboy. Thought it was gonna end us. Doesnt look like it has. We just have to keep things on the downlow. Neither of us are in the position to be "public" about our relationship but our Managers at work know and support us as well as a few of our co-workers and trusted friends...

Suga, Taz & I found us a place to live. Its a HUGE 4 bed 2 bath out in the middle of nowhere. Waiting to hear from the Landlord to see if he gives it to us or someone else. We're crossing our fingers. I was telling cowboy out it and I said I couldn't wait for the 4 of us to move in together and get to spend more time with him and he goes "I'm not moving in" I was floored. "What do you mean? That was the plan wasn't it?" and he's all "ya, but the plan has changed" and I said "Ok, let me in on the new plan then" and he goes "I'm gonna buy us our own house and your gonna move in with me, I dont want to share you with anyone, not even roommates" It was so sweet. I was almost concered there for a bit, I didn't know if the previous day's bullshit had gotten to him or not. And I was like "Phew, you still wanna be with me then" and he goes "i'm not sure, I think I'm gonna have to go check my little black book and see" with a little shit eatin grin on his face. We both started bustin up laughin. I love how he can make a bad night turn good just by showing up at work.

He said he's going to find a better job. He says that I make him want to strive to be better in everything and every aspect of his life.

We were outside talking yesterday and He wrapped his arms around me (sounded like he was about to cry) and kept sayin over and over "where were you 10 years ago? why couldn't it have been you and not her?" Well, thing is, we went to diff schools. We spent like maybe 1 or 2 years at the same school when he went to my high school, but we really didn't know each other. I remember thinking he was hot back then. He says the same.

This is dedicated to my cowboy, who is so close, but yet so far away....

Nickelback Far Away

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there’s just one left
‘Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you’ll be with me
and you’ll never go
Stop breathing if
I don’t see you anymore

On my knees, I’ll ask
Last chance for one last dance
‘Cause with you, I’d withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I’d give it all
I’d give for us
Give anything but I won’t give up
‘Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you’ll be with me
and you’ll never go
Stop breathing if
I don’t see you anymore

So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
‘Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
‘Cause I’m not leaving
Hold on to me and
never let me go

~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~
Feeling: Hopeful


Listening to: Nickelback