New Year almost upon us.

And a time when I've been reflecting back upon the previous year. Most of which I'm happy about, but still alot I am sad about.

One issue in particular is that I have lost my bestfriend this year. And it deeply saddens me. I get one friend back ( Baer ) and lose another ( LilBit ). She's not the Same person I use to know. And it makes me sad. I want to call her and be her friend and wish her the happiest of holidays, but she has hurt me and Baer too badly. I dont think I'll beable to ever forget. She and I use to be so close, but she's changed so much. If I had known to this extreme, I never would have suggested for her and Baer to meet up.

We had a wonderful Thankgiving, both at my parent's and Hephaestus's parents. Finally talked Baer into comming with us. We had a wonderful time. And I hope that he did too.

We're still having our Pagan Night Outs. Some have been better than others. But I'm sure that as the word spreads, that they'll be even better.

I'm really excited about the year ahead. I'm really excited about the prospect of owning our home. Crossing my fingers we have enough money from our tax refunds that we can put a downpayment on a house. That is my biggest dream right now....That and getting pregnant :)

Hephaestus and I have had a few issues. But I'm starting to think it was all in my head. I feel so lonely and scared at this time of year. I made it through Halloween fine, mostly because we weren't here in Arkansas where I would be constantly reminded to me of me being so sick in 95 that I was in the hospital constantly. And then ofcourse its comming on the anniversary of my surgery for the cancer last year. I just need my husband close by. To know that I am truly safe and loved. That I have no fears and/or worries...

Well, I'm gonna git outa here for now. Hephaestus is on an emergency service call and Baerie wants to go out for Chinese food (MY FAVE!!! WOOHOOO)

C-ya later aligators.